It always comes around, back to this

I never thought I'd want to go back this bad.

I can't get Africa off my mind. I can't get homeless parents and hopeless children to stop breaking my heart. Recently all I want to do is escape the scholastic world and go back.

Or, maybe, not even go back. Maybe make a difference where I am. I volunteer at the Crisis Nursery here in Springfield. Have you ever rocked a baby to sleep knowing that his parents never want to sing him a lullaby? Have you ever looked into the eyes of a seven year old and known that you will be the only one to ask him how his day was at school?

I have. I do. And I hate it.

I am literally one of the luckiest girls in the world. I have a God that shows me every day how special I am. I have friends and family that know how to make me smile...friends that take me to Chipotle between classes on rainy days and friends that know my love of Toy Story 2...family that always cares...

I am so loved. I am shown how precious I am to my Father every day in every way, shape, and form.

I just want to share one ounce of this love I receive with these kids. I wish I could put my entire heart into every one of these children's lives, because it WOULD make a world of difference. I could literally change someone's life...this thought blows me away.

But there's too many. There's homeless people lining Commercial street every night. There's pregnant girls who have no one to turn to. There's children who live weeks at a time at the Crisis Nursery. The area in which I live has one of the highest child abuse rates in America, and I can't help every one of these children, there's too many. God is the one who sees the child crying himself to sleep at night, and I CAN'T DO ANYTHING.

This has been on my heart for weeks. I can't sleep when I think about it. I can't focus in class. I'm just doing what I can. I'm pouring every bit of happiness into the kids at the Crisis Nursery that I can. I'm going to start helping lead a parents group for teens at Rare Breed with Sienna.

I'm going to pray for these kids and look for how I can make a difference.

"Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."